They Never Go To The Bathroom

I just finished a long book, 540-some pages, a real thick story of a guy.

He's off doing mysterious things in mysterious places. He wakes up from a long nap -- maybe a whole day's nap -- and immediately goes to work writing a long poem in one sitting. And I'm thinking, How come this guy doesn't have to pee first?

He does all kinds of things throughout the book but he apparently never goes to the bathroom.

I desire and demand that books give potty breaks to the people in the pages. It's ridiculous, for example, that there aren't that many references to going to the bathroom in literature. I know in the Bible, 1 Kings somewhere, like chapter 18, it refers to men peeing against the wall. And in Ezekiel he's supposed to cook his bread over a fire fueled by human dung (chapter 4), although he pleads with God and it's reduced to cow dung.

But what about the feeding of the 5,000? They're out in the wilderness and you gotta think some of those people had to go to the bathroom out there. What a mess it must've been, no outhouses or arrangements.