The Annotated Puano Post

If bat poop is guano, is pigeon poop puano?

Bat poop is indeed called guano. There's probably some very good reason for that. But there's no reason that other poops would rhyme with guano. And certainly there's no logical reason why the name for bat poop would have any bearing on what the name for pigeon poop is. In the question, it seems to be looking for an alliterative significance between the P in "pigeon" and the P replacing the G in "guano." But alliteration surely has nothing to do with it, as is seen in the example of bat poop, starting with a B and guano starting with a G.


I heard bats aren't birds and whales aren't fish. You can't trust your senses.

You actually can trust your senses. But maybe not if your senses are so self-limiting, such as thinking that everything that flies is a bird and everything that swims is a fish. Scientists, who are in the know about the various species, make observations of bats, birds, whales, and fish. They have analyzed their structures, their behaviors, etc., and have classified them, as is the wont of scientists, generally given to much classifying of information. (That's one reason you should keep scientists away from graph paper, because they go bananas when given the opportunity to graph and quantify things.)

Scientists come to various conclusions about the species and so, trusting their senses, state that bats are not birds and whales are not fish.

The statement above to the contrary does speak of senses and conclusions, but draws a conclusion hastily, without exercising sense knowledge or following it through to definite knowledge.

Random Names Virus Tweets (Collect Them All)

There's something wrong with my PAULSON computer. Like right there RICKY. I'm typing along and it inserts a name at random BERTHA.

As far as I can GLENN tell it's stealing from my 140 MARGARET characters. So if WEN HO LEE I have a thought, I need to THOMAS TRAIN abbrevia

This stupid thing POLLY! This has to be a virus BUSCHMACHER. Buschmacher? Is that even a name. Probably. GERMANIC FLU. That's ridiculous.

PILSON. That just popped up. SAM ADAMS. It's getting worse TONY. I'm pulling the plug LILLIAN. The backspace JAMES ST. JAMES doesn't work.

ADDAMS FAMILY. WEN HO LEE. Wen Ho Lee? Isn't that the guy who was accused of being a spy? And found not guilty. RED SOVINE. Teddy Bear guy?

It's maddening. JOHANNA. Where's it getting these names? HENRIKSSON. Looks Swedish but I've never been there. I shower so I don't swed.

PAGLIACCI. RENFIELD. Renfield I know. He's the fly eating DECLAN guy from Dracula, not DECLAN. Isn't that ELVIS Costello's name?

I need to turn it off MARGARET. Weird stupid computer. Stupid FLINTSTONE computer. Bye.